A lot of people like pop music. A lot of people like mustard.
And so the analogy begins...
Musicians are funny sometimes. Especially when they get arrogant. It's sort of like Mayonaise going on about how great it is because so many people like it.
Genres would be like condiment types, individual brand names like the individual musicians.
There are so many different versions of Ketchup. Ketchup being the Rock N' Roll of condiments.
Then along comes Heinz - The Rolling Stones/Elvis Presley/Led Zepplin of condiments, and entirely redefines what it means to be crushed tomatoes.
Then there's niche genres, like wasabi, various hot sauces and relishes, etc., etc.
But what I find hilarious about musicians, especially ones who are consumed with their own flavour, is when a bottle of No Name Brand Ketchup starts beaking off about how great it is, and how every other condiment is rubbish.
"In this vicious and competitive market, it's plain to see that I, No Name Brand Ketchup - whose popularity is soley in one or two countries - am simply the best there is. Look at my ingredients! Look at all the hard work that went in to mashing the tomatoes, adding the secret spices, and all the time it took to get it from the vine to your french fries!" - No Name Brand Ketchup.org
And Mayonaise is siting there like, "Hey, what the Hell-man? People like me on their fries in France, a LOT of people like me, who the heck are you!?"
That same bottle of No Name Brand Ketchup can go on and on about how wasabi and Frank's Hot Sauce are sophomoric efforts by the companies that produce them, and that anyone who pays attention to wasabi or Franks' has bad taste...
But, the truth is - popularity doesn't define quality. A lot of people like Britney Spears/Justin Bieber/Kanye West. Tastes are different. Some people don't even like ketchup on their french fries. Some people eat dijon mustard sandwiches. Oh so refined. Everyone is entitled to have the right to their own tastes. There's no accounting for it. I hated olives when I was a kid, I love olives now.
Sure, a lot of people couldn't live without condiments. I wouldn't want to eat mashed potatoes without hot sauce and barbeque sauce - but that's me.
Condiments aren't really food itself, it's not like anyone really needs condiments to live. Heinz Ketchup won't tell you that, but I will, because I'm being honest with you.
There are those who are in the condiment business, who manufacture and produce said condiments. They're paying through the nose to make damn sure you're exposed to and like their product.
Condiments spice up our life, they are not life itself. As humans, we do not soley rely on condiments to live.
So when some deluded musician starts talking like No Name Brand Ketchup, just ignore him.
Everyone knows he has bad taste.
Share this with your friends and enemies if you feel the same way I do.